One of these days

I have got to get my life back in order.

The house is a wreck. I don’t bother to change out of my pajamas most days unless I have to leave the house.

There are still unpacked boxes and we moved here four months ago.

I can’t help but ask myself what the point of unpacking is though. This place is just another rental. We probably won’t be staying once our lease is up in June. The house is old and drafty and has problems. It’s cheap though, and close to the boy’s school so it’ll do for now.

I finally got the 3 foot pile of laundry tackled today. I also started a new Goodwill bag, and put a lot of my office work clothes in it which was really hard. I miss working outside of the home. But with Hubby being on the road, and O only being a year old, and the cost of daycare, well, I’m having to admit to myself that going back to work just isn’t happening right now. I can’t begin to describe how sad that makes me.

I’ve finally been driving for the first time in months and for the most part my anxiety is staying away. I’m still taking my Prozac and following what my therapist told me to do. Hubby’s 90 day waiting period on insurance at his company is up and I’m really excited to have health insurance again soon.Woohoo! Health insurance! Party time! Excellent! Dude, I’m so old I’m thrilled at the thought of a check up. I’m hoping going back to the therapist and seeing if my doctor can tweak my medicine will help.

Even with that though, I will still be home, all day, every day, trying to be interactive with my kids, and keep the house clean, and cook meals and snacks.

I know this sounds whiny, and ungrateful, and has first world problems written all over it, but it’s my blog, so what the hell. I can write and whine about what I want.

Outside of the house, I act fine, but then I get home and look around and wonder what I’m doing. What I’m going to do.

I have got to get my life back in order.

About SarahK

Single mom. Cat lady. Loves red wine, thrift stores, the zombie apocalypse, artsy craftsy projects I never finish, tacos, Sherlock, and old houses.
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